Tuesday, 27 April 2010

Alphabe-Thursday - O is for Oasis and Optimism


This blog was never intended for anything but a bit of fun. My banner says it was meant to provide an oasis and that was what I wanted to do - promise anyone who followed that there would always be something positive to read here, or something funny or entertaining. Not for me the angst, the baring of the soul, the ranting and raving. Most of those things are, at least in my life, short lived and I have no wish to record them for posterity! So I have been a little quiet recently. Last week's Note From My Mum was not a joke. I have, in the last few weeks, had to come to terms with the fact that I am now a full time carer, my husband and my mother both need a lot of care and between them they take a lot of my energy and time.
I have worked since I left school at 18. I was a lawyer though I tend to keep that to myself these days. I was also a book keeper as a sideline. I was single until I was 36. When I gave up my job just before Christmas it was to give myself six months to catch up with a lot of things before I looked for something else, but I now realise that planning to get another job has been creating its own stress. My own health has been a bit suspect and I don't have the stamina to keep going all the time. Now that I have decided that I am not going to do that I find myself truly feeling a lot more optimistic about the future because I can give my energies to the two people who I love most in the world, and who need me the most and be very glad and feel, frankly, very blessed, that I harbour not one iota of resentment about the situation..
I am extremely fortunate that we can manage without my earning. Hubby being in a wheelchair means that we don't spend on things like holidays, or going very far afield for trips, neither of us smoke, he doesn't drink and I only do in moderation, I have time to cook real meals which are much cheaper than ready made and I have a wardrobe full of clothes that I used to keep for work, or best, which I can now wear to do the gardening in should I so desire. The social life I have is with the people I genuinely want to spend time with, not because they are the people I need to cultivate or people to whom I "owe" an invitation.
I may actually find that I will have the time and space to start preaching again - oh yes, have I told you I am a Methodist Preacher? I haven't been active for a few years because of all the other stuff that has been going on but I am hoping that might change in time. In God's time and mine.
So, for all you fraught and frazzled bloggers, this little oasis will remain open for business for the foreseeable future. I will welcome your company on this new journey and will stay optimistic I hope
More "o" s ( which makes an "oooooo" ) HERE

18 comments:

  1. Glad you have been able to make that decision - doesn't seem right, somehow, you going back to work - enjoy your time and make the most of the choices ahead of you!xx

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  2. Oh i love your "O" post. Enjoy your time with your loved ones, they are the ones that enrich your life!

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  3. Such an open hearted post from you this week, it's been good to get to know you a little better.
    It sounds as if you have reached the right decision for now, stay optimistic!
    ~Maggie~

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  4. I enjoyed your optimism. We are both retired and lived very much the way you and your hubby do - no trips or vacations because I can't travel. He cooks because he's great at it. We save our pennies that way.

    Enjoy yourself! It's time to do that!

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  5. I'm happy that you've come to terms with being a caregiver and are optimistic about it. Make sure to take lots of me time for yourself too. Sometimes caregivers get lost in the shuffle.

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  6. so great that you are feeling optimistic again :D

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  7. Really sad! I left a comment yesterday but it's not here! Just want ot ytell you that I'm on a new journey as well so we can keep each other company with the occasional kick up the back side!

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  8. You have taken something negative and made it so positive.

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  9. I hope you will excuse our good natured razzing last week over your post.

    I apologize if it made you feel bad in anyway!

    And now...

    You have such a lovely spirit. How blessed the people that need you are to have you there...able, willing and creatively attempting to solve what must be one of the most difficult tasks around...being a full-time caregiver.

    Your positive attitude in the face of this is absolutely outstanding.

    It seems like you are a force to be reckoned with...always finding Plan "B's" when you need to...a trait I admire more than almost any in a person!

    Thank you for sharing your story with us.

    And thanks for taking time for you and blessing us when you share in Alphabe-Thursday each week!

    Hugs and A+

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  10. Jaydubblah, what an interesting and lovely woman you are. I am certain your husband and mother are very grateful for your love and care.
    Many Blessings to you!

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  11. oh the curve balls life throws us. Some days are so hard some choices so big - but we make them, come to peace with them and somehow we press on! great post

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  12. Oasis and optimism are places we need to go and things we need -thanks for providing them here.

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  13. What a lovely open and honest post :)

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  14. The world can use all the optimism it can get, thank you for being such a place :) . Bless you for being a full-time caregiver, I know that must be difficult at times. And I would LOVE to hear you preach (my husband is a preacher) ... not for me, there's no backspace button when you are speaking :) ... !
    Many Blessings,
    Catherine :)

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  15. you are very inspirational...thank you for sharing your optimism with us.

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  16. I'm glad that you are optimistic about your job decision and future. It sounds like you'll be an excellent care giver.

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  17. I am so touched and encouraged seeing your heart in this post. Though your circumstances are not easy, I can hear your peace and joy in the huge task of caring for those you love. There is contentment in where you've been and where you are in life. This is a gift. So while I recognize the genuinely emotion and energy challenging season you are in and my heart goes out to you, I also find an oasis here in your response. Thank you.

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  18. Thank you. I think we all need an oasis at times. I think it's wonderful that you have given yourself permission to do what is right for you and your family right now.

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